Experimental Fish

Sister C: Look at my new fish!  It's a betta fish.

Sister A: Beta fish?  So it's like...not a real fish yet?

Summer schedule announcements

Hello disgracepoint readers,

One more announcement...  During the summer, we are going to stretch out the posts by not posting on Saturdays or Sundays.  Those days are low-viewing days, according to google analytics, so we're not going to post on those days during the summer, and then we'll start to post every odd day again starting fall.

In those days, you can visit the punwithgracepoint site!

Hello readers,

I am happy to announce that the Pun with Gracepoint has come back.  There was a time when disgracepoint tried to do a takeover on the pun site by featuring our own puns, but we had realized how grave of a mistake that was.. not because those puns were horrible, but mostly because we had failed to realize how many of our loyal disgracepoint readers were English Patients, who were simply dumbfounded by these puns which they could not comprehend. So we had come up with an exit strategy.

Now, however, enough time has passed to allow the pain to heal, we are happy to announce to you the PunWithGracepoint site again, proudly standing independently from disgracepoint.  We are proud of them, and although the exit strategy was abrupt and painful, we are happy that punwithgracepoint is alive and well, despite the fact that it still remains to be very unfriendly toward English Patients.

Check out their latest puns at: http://punwithgracepoint.blogspot.com/

English Patient: Toy

Friend: You know that toy where you can interchange the parts?  You can put on a mustache, or a nose, etc..

English Patient J: Oh!  Like the egg in Toy Story!

Friend: (pause) Do you mean Mr. Potato Head?

English Patient J: He wasn’t an egg?

Genius is a Relative Term

Brother A: When I go to Starbucks, I only drink half a cup..  I always get a Tall and throw half of it away.

Sister A: Why don't you just get a Short, then?

Brother A: ... Wow, that's genius.

English Patient: Car Freshener

Sister J: Wow... Your car always smells of your arrogance.

Strange Lyrics

Setting: On the way back from the Starfield concert...

Sister S: Today, when I saw the lyrics "angels and men adore", I was really surprised, because all this time, I thought it was "angels and minotaurs"

Friend: (pause) And you never thought that was strange?

Sister S: No.

Father Abraham Had Many Sons…

Setting: A bunch of brothers are sitting around reviewing the portions of the Bible that they had read through, and a particular brother was having a hard time remembering..  So brother JC, wanting to give him an obvious hint, starts to sing the children’s song “Father Abraham had many sons…”

Brother JC: Father Abraham had many sons… many sons had Father Abraham… and I am one of them, and so are you… so let’s all praise the Lord…

Brother JK: Oh my gosh!!!  That song was about Abraham in the Bible?  I always thought that it was about Abraham Lincoln!

Conversations with a Personal Trainer

Setting: Brother B is talking with his personal trainer…

Trainer: All right… so let’s talk about your nutrition.  What kinds of meats do you like?

Brother B: I like pork and beef.

Trainer: (concerned).. Well, do you like chicken?

Brother B: Oh yeah!  I love KFC.

Trainer: (pause)  Alright… let’s do lunges now.

Brother B: Okay, where?

Trainer: What??

Brother B: Where do you want to eat lunch?

Gracepoint Magic Mountain Video

This is from one of our video vimeo site, but thought it was really funny, so just wanted to put it up here as well. 

English Patient: Big Shot

For a Kobuilders Work Night, an English Patient walks up to the sister who is giving out work assignments and says, "Hey!  BIG LADY!"

It is not clear to this day what this English Patient meant to say.  Some say that it might have been an accidental combination of "Big Boss" or "Big Shot"...

English Patient: Movie Titles

Brother B: Hey, I’m looking for the soundtrack for that movie that we saw last night…  I think it was called Shang Dang Redemption.

Nature of Ice Cream

submitted by Tim Aucott

Brother S: Hey, why is this ice cream scooper so cold?

Friend: Because it was used to scoop ice cream.

Brother S: No, I mean it's really cold. Almost frozen.  It's like it was in ice or something.

Friend: Yeah... it was used to scoop ice cream.

English Patient: Napkin

Brother M: Hey pass me that nafkin.

Friend: What did you say?

Brother M: Nafkin.

Friend: Dude, it’s napkin.

Brother M: You mean N-A-P-K-I-N.. like taking a nap?

Friend: Yeah.

Brother M: Ha ha ha ha!!  You don’t know English!!

Unintentional Meaning: Hydration

Setting: Sister S from Gracepoint Austin is talking to Sister D about the importance of keeping hydrated.  They are in the middle of a large group.

Sister S: Did you get enough to drink today?  You don't drink enough water.

Sister D: Yes, I'm drinking Gatorade right now.

Sister S: (announces to the entire group) Hey everyone!!  Whenever you're with Sister D, you need to make sure she's drunk!"