Gracepoint Berkeley Kids: Tired

Recently, Sarah my wife was trying to put my daughter Michelle, now at age 5, to sleep.
Michelle kept on saying, "I'm tired... I'm so tired."

So Sarah told her, "Michelle, stop saying that. If you keep saying that, you are going to feel more tired."

Michelle then said, "I'm tired, I'm tired, I'm tired!"

Sarah raised her voice and sternly said, "Michelle! I told you not to say that! Why are you saying it even more?"

Michelle replied, "But I want to get more tired, so that I can go to sleep."


Setting: A particular Sister S from Gracepoint Austin used to work at a place where she had to make a lot of phone calls. Once, when Sister S was making a phone call, she got an answering machine, and this is what she said:

“Hi, this is S. Just wanted to remind you that when you get the document, please remember to sign off on it. Please let me know if you have any questions, and please give whatever feedback you want to. In Jesus’ name I pray.” [click]

Why, why, why

The predominant response of people who have seen this picture of Jasper wearing a bullfighter outfit has been, “Why, why why??” In response, Jasper keeps on saying that that picture was from his high school days in Taiwan… as if that answers the question.


English Patient: Back Pains

This English Patient is known as Sister M, who was formerly Sister G.

Friend 1: Wow, Friend 2, how's your husband's back? Did he hurt his back playing the guitar and stomping his foot too hard?

Friend 2: No, he hurt it lifting stuff at the Element Yard Sale.

Friend 3: Oh no, the Element brother staff are taking turns hurting their backs.

Sister M: Hey, Friend 1, you should be careful. First Kenny, now many people are throwing up their backs these days.


Sister M: ...What? I said something that will be on Dis-Gracepoint, didn't I?

Friend 3: Oh no, we wouldn't do that to you.

Chinese Patient: Happy New Year

This was during one New Year's Eve service. When midnight hit, everyone got up to hug and say "Happy New Year" to each other. I saw my peer Brother K and decided to say "Happy New Year" to him in Cantonese, just for fun.

"Gong hay fat choy!"

Brother K, whose last name happens to be Choi, abruptly stopped and said indignantly, "Hey! Who you calling a fat Choi!"

Hurting: Korean

Setting: At Gracepoint Berkeley Worldview Camp, Brother J sees Sister Diana Correa's name tag and asks…

Brother J: Diana, are you half-Korean?

Diana: [pause] What??? Is it because my last name is Correa?

Brother J: [silence]

English Patient: The Meaning of Hay

This is a story of 2 English Patients, Brother S and Brother Y.

Brother S was asked by the 7-year-old Jonathan Suh to read him a children’s picture book about farm animals. Brother S was a bit nervous, because he didn’t want to be caught with a word that he didn’t know from a children’s book.

But upon the 7-year-old’s insistence, Brother S relented and started to read the book. Then his fears came to fruition.. He ran into the word that he didn’t know. H-A-Y

He kept on reading, hoping that Jonathan will not ask him about the definition of that mysterious word. Thankfully, he didn’t ask Brother S what “hay” was, so Brother S survived through the reading without a glitch.

Brother S then met Brother Y, a more infamous English Patient. Brother S asked Brother Y, “Do you know what the word H-A-Y means?”

Brother Y confidently replied, “Oh yeah.. HAY is the past tense of HEY. Like I hay him yesterday.”

English Patient: Threat

submitted by Calvin Lee

English Patient J writes an email:

”Please pay me for the attached bill, or else I’ll haunt you down.”

Someone thought that maybe he made a spelling error, but when asked, brother J revealed the fact that he thought that was the right meaning… That he would haunt you down like Casper.

Poor Sister SY: Office Mats

Sister S, who is among us today, had a younger sister whom we shall call "SY". As she was growing up Sister S liked to play tricks on her younger sister SY, so one day, Sister S got her dad's clear plastic office chair mats under his rolling office chairs. Then she placed the mats at the various doorways throughout the house, placing them upside down, so that the pointy spikes that stabilize the mats onto the carpet were now exposed, facing up.

Then Sister S called SY in a very desperate, hurried voice, "SY!! SY!! Come here right now! Hurry!"

Sister SY, thinking that there was something very wrong, ran toward the voice of Sister S, who happened to be all the way at the other end of the house.

Whenever she went through the doorway, she would step on the pointy ends and cry out, "Ow ow ow!!" But because of the adrenaline rush, sister SY just kept on running toward Sister S.

When SY got there, she found Sister S rolling on the ground laughing.

Lost Pen

Sister S: Hey, Sister A, you know the pen you gave me? I can't find it...
Sister A: Oh, you lost it already?
Sister S: No. I just don't know where it is.
Sister A: So... you lost it.
Sister S: No. I just don't know where it is.
Sister A: ...

Hurting: Color-blindness

During his junior high days, Brother E, who is color-blind, saw that everyone was carrying a cool-looking black bag. He wanted to be "with it", so he went out to the department store, found the same bag and bought it. He proudly carried around the bag at school for a while, until one day someone came up to him and said, "Hey, why are you carrying around a purple bag?"

Moving Boxes

  Setting : A Slack message goes out regarding moving boxes -- "For the smaller boxes, let's try to fit them into our trunks of car...