9/27/13

Handsome Guys of Hsinchu

Setting: A group of 10 brothers are riding an elevator in a department store. It stops on a floor and a middle-aged couple walks in.

Wife: (In Chinese) "wow, 都是帥哥 (a bunch of handsome young guys)."

Brother L: "oh yeah, thanks!"

Husband: Oh honey, could you press the button for the third floor?

Wife: [after squinting at the buttons for a few seconds]  sorry, which one is it?  I can't really see...  I didn't bring my glasses.

[..silence for the rest of the elevator ride]

9/23/13

Difficult English Descriptions

Setting: An email conversation among a household of sisters that went something like this...
English Patient Sister B: Let's do a deep clean of the house!  Every book and cranny!
Healthy English Friend: Ha ha!  Yeah, let's clean every book and page in the house!  :)
English Patient Sister E: (replying to Sister B privately, to help her out)  It's every "crack and cranny", I think.

9/19/13

Label Makers

Here's a picture of a label that was printed out and attached.

Gracepoint Davis labels















A bunch of people at Gracepoint Davis were laughing at this picture.  Brother B stares intensely into the picture and asks, "What's wrong with this picture?"

NOTE: Whenever we see a restaurant menu with really bad spelling (such as China Village's "Pork Dumping" menu item), we have wondered why the restaurant owners wouldn't first check their spelling before actually printing it out and laminating it.  But now we know how such a thing would happen.  They DID check with someone.  It's just that that someone was the wrong someone.

9/17/13

Dangers of Chopsticks

Here's an actual sign posted at a Vietnamese restaurant.


9/13/13

English Patient: How Would You Like Your Eggs?

Waitress: How would you like your eggs?

Sister M: Cooked.

Waitress: Oh, I meant, would you like it scrambled? sunny-side up?

Sister M: Sorry!  ha ha..  I want it scrambled.

Waitress: (Turning to Sister C sitting at the same table) How would you like your eggs?

Sister C: Well done.

9/3/13

Keeping English Patients Anonymous

Here's a photo of a speed scrabble game.  This inspiring piece was the work of a particular Sister Y of Gracepoint Berkeley, who will remain anonymous.