Love and Marriage: Green Onions

Jessica: Thanks for doing the shopping for tonight's dinner.

James: No problem.

Jessica: (looks in the bag) Is this everything?

James: Yea.

Jessica: But I only see 1 bunch of green onions, I asked for 6.

James: Your shopping list said 6 green onions, so I bought 6 green onions.

Jessica: I meant 6 BUNCHES of green onions.

James: But your shopping list didn't say bunches. It just said 6 green onions. All the other items on the list you specified 1 pack, 2 bags, so how was I supposed to know that you meant bunches?

Jessica: Because the grocery stores sell them by the bunch. 3 bunches for 99 cents. It should be obvious.

James: Well, you should have been more specific. I was just following the list you gave me.

Jessica: (looks at the green onions) So you happened to buy the bunch that contained 6 green onions?

James: No, that bunch contained a few more, so I took those out and just bought these.

Jessica: (long silence)

James: I'll go to Safeway right now and buy the rest.


Unknown said...

I sense terror in that moment of long silence....

joyceyen said...

i'm glad, jess, that you are learning the Chinese language. this would totally have been avoided as in Chinese we have specific, required measure words to avoid misunderstandings such as these! 加油!

Jenn Chen said...

So that's why there are always those random bunches of green onions...haha ;)

Marcus said...

In James' defense, I'll say that I probably would have done the same thing with regard to the onions. And if I were married, I'm sure I would have gone back to the store to remedy the situation as well.

stephany said...

this just bolsters the idea that men do take things literally (to harp off a comment given to an earlier post). seriously, why would you take out green onions and give it back to be charged for the same amount that you would if you had them altogether? seems silly to me... :P

Anonymous said...

one time knowing i wouldn't be at an event i asked someone to be sure to bring his own camera gear to cover the event. after the event..

Sis: hey can i get those photos from you?
Bro: (puzzled) what photos?
Sis: the ones you took..?
Bro: didn't take asked me to bring my camera. did you want me to take pics?
Sis: ...yes. sooo.. you brought your camera cuz i asked you to but didn't shoot because i didn't ask you to?
Bro: yes.
Sis: so you brought it and just carried it around?
Bro: yes.
Sis: ok...
Bro: hm...
Both: (utterly confused)

Judy said...

this is hilarious - i'm sure this can be used as a message illustration sometime.

Moving Boxes

  Setting : A Slack message goes out regarding moving boxes -- "For the smaller boxes, let's try to fit them into our trunks of car...