Dis-Gracepoint Berkeley

Bible Verse Recitation

Here are some samples of brothers' Bible verse memorization gone terribly wrong...

Brother J: "Praising God and enjoying the flavor of all the people.."

Brother T: "No, I beat your body and make it my slave..."

Brother D: "As the hen gathers her cheeks together..."

Brother D: "And Jesus said, 'Didn't I heal ten leopards?'"

Normal vs. Timothy Rhee

Pastor Timothy Rhee of Waypoint Community Church (in Davis) was ordained, and this was the normal vs. video that was shown during the ordination service.

Movie Tickets

Merry Christmas, Disgracepoint readers!

Here's a quote by an English Patient.. well, I'm not sure if this is an English Patient, or just a Common Sense Patient...

Friend: Hey, I got our group movie tickets from Costco for 7.50!

Common Sense Patient: Oh... that's good... But it's kind of hard.

Friend: Why?

Common Sense Patient: Does that mean we can only watch movies that start at 7:50?

Gracepoint TC: Old Folks

West Side Story is a difficult musical to do, but they pulled it off pretty well.

English Patient: More Than Meets the Eye

There is a sister M in Bridgeway Church who thought for a long time that the games that were played with a new group of people were "eyes breakers". When asked why she thought this, she answered, "Because when we first meet someone, there's a barrier, so we can't look at each other in the eyes. But after playing the eyes breaker, we can break through that barrier and look at each other in the eyes."

Wow, that almost makes sense.

Gracepoint TC: The Pilgrim's Paradise

This won the prize, "Can't even show in Disgracepoint", but it was too perfect to pass up.

The sound problems that he was having just goes to demonstrate how precarious the whole idea of "cool" is, and how dependent it is on something so flimsy as background music.

John Ko could have looked kind of cool if the music worked, but when it didn't, and John was posing in silence, his envisioned coolness quickly turned into something disgracepoint-worthy.

English Patient: In-Laws

Friend: Hey Brother Y, do you know where brother S is?

Brother Y: "I think he's with the family, hanging out with his outlaws."

Gracepoint TC: DT

Another outstanding performance at Gracepoint TC... There's nothing really embarrassing about this performance, except for Michael & Joanna Kang's intro video, which was one of the sickest things ever.

A Man and His Pain

Setting: Brother S, who is known among his peers as someone who insists on doing things that are "manly", one day dislocated his shoulder quite badly and was taken to the hospital.

The nurse approached him and said, "Now, on a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being no pain at all and 10 being the worst pain imaginable, what is the level of pain that you feel right now?"

Brother S answered, "Zero."

The nurse paused for a bit, and then asked him again, "On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your level of..."

"Zero," interrupted Brother S.

The nurse then proceeded to hold his arm and move it upwards, causing his shoulder to rotate. Then she asked, "How about now?"

"Zero," said Brother S.

She moved the arm further up and asked, "How about now?"

Brother S winced, then caught his breath again, then said, "... zero."

The nurse looked at Brother S with a particular look that was interpreted by Brother S as awe, but some said that it could have been interpreted as a look of pity. She moved the arm further up, and before she could ask Brother S any question, brother S shouted, "Ten, ten, ten, ten!!!!!"

Gracepoint TC: Under Pressure

By popular demand, here's Under Pressure...

It's hard to hear the audience reaction on any of these videos... So it can appear a lot more embarrassing than it actually was. For a version of Under Pressure with audience reaction, you can check it out at the corresponding post of the a2f Gold site.

Also, a closeup version of Praxis' Hallelujah Surprise...

English Patient: Restaurants

I heard about a very good Chinese restraint.

That salad was good. I wonder what the entry will be.

Demotivator Contest Winners

Gold medal goes to "Groupthink" by anonymous

Silver goes to "Idiom" by Justin

Bronze goes to "Innovation" by John

Gracepoint TC: Hallelujah

Gracepoint Praxis deparment did the following for our grand opening act for our TC. They won the award for "the performance most likely to cause the original composer to turn over in his grave."

After the Thanksgiving Celebration, I heard that the original idea was for them to "take off" their heads at the end of the song, roll it around and throw it down on the ground. That idea got axed before it made it to the stage, thankfully -- or else we would have seen some people faint in the audience. I have no idea what message that decapitation would have communicated that is even remotely related to Handel's Messiah.

English Patient: Email

Happy Thanksgiving!

Setting: An English Patient T sends out this logistics email regarding the Youth Winter Retreat 2007...

"Just wanted to note that there have been updates to the rooster ever since the initial rooster was sent out. From the rooster that Elise sent out last night, I see a couple that have been updated in the database, but not updated on the rooster."

Vamos a la Gracepoint

From our Gracepoint Thanksgiving Celebration...

Please don't watch this more than twice, as it can be harmful for your emotional health.

There are more to come from this year's TC... Disgracepoint is thankful for TC, because it provides so much material for many months to come.

Dishgracepoint Recipe

Every year around Thanksgiving, there's a story that gets passed around about a certain brother D as a warning to everyone else on what not to do... And since this story will invariably get passed around again, I decided to preemptively write about it here, speaking in the first-person perspective.

Many years ago, my wife S and I had the honor and privilege of cooking a turkey for our group. I bought the turkey 2 days before the cooking day, hoping that it would be enough time to thaw in the refrigerator. But when the time came, I realized that the turkey was still frozen solid in various spots -- which meant that I was in trouble.

I thought for a moment about what I should do, and then came up with a brilliant solution. In a mere 30 minutes, the turkey was thawed, and after 4 hours, I had one of the best-looking turkeys of Thanksgiving Celebration.

Beaming with pride, I called wife S and said, "The turkey was still frozen when I took it out of the fridge. But guess what I did!"

"What?" said S.

"I blow-dried it and then put it next to our room heater! And boom! It was thawed in like 30 minutes!"

There was a brief silence, and then she said, "Uhh... I'm not sure if you were supposed to do that." Then I heard her speaking with some other sisters on the other side of the line, and then I heard a great number of sisters laughing and screaming in the background. They told me that I needed to just throw the whole turkey away. But the turkey looked so beautiful that it seemed like a waste to just throw it away. Supposedly if you do that to any poultry, one who eats it might get this thing called salmonella poisoning, which could possibly cause some minor symptoms like stomach cramps, fever and death. I tried to argue that maybe this turkey could be used as a "display turkey", but they wouldn't have it, just in case someone takes it and eats it. So I had to throw the whole turkey away.

To this day, I think that turkey was the best-looking turkey ever made in Gracepoint Fellowship Church. It had that perfect brown skin all over without a single burnt spot, which I was never able to reproduce since. Perhaps its perfect brownness was because I had warmed it up nice and toasty next to the heater for 30 minutes, but no matter -- it was still the most beautiful turkey ever. I sometimes wonder, what if I didn't brag about my turkey to my wife over the phone? That's why I think it's useful to brag sometimes, as long as you're okay about being humiliated by the laughter of a multitude of sisters.

Note: For a good way to cook turkeys, check out Tom Kim's dishgracepoint site, where he posted a great turkey recipe called "Gracepoint Turkey Recipe"!

Disgracepoint Demotivator Caption Contest

Please vote for the demotivator captions on the right. This is for the previous demotivator post with the boat and the truck

English Patient: Acalpulco Restaurant

Setting: Peers arrive at Acalpulco Restaurant

Friend: Wow! I didn't realize that there was a restaurant here!

English Patient: What the? This is not an acupuncture place?